The Bishop Writes

(From the March 22, 2001 edition of the Inland Register)

Several articles have recently appeared in the Walla Walla newspapers and then March 4 in a rather large front-page story in Spokane’s daily newspaper, the Spokesman-Review, concerning a sexual abuse incident that took place at DeSales High School over 25 years ago. A former principal who at the time was a Marianist Brother was involved.

Several years ago I wrote about this topic without spelling out the details, and I expressed an apology on behalf of the Diocese of Spokane for any abuse perpetrated by priests and others who serve in the name of the diocese. In regard to the Walla Walla situation more specifically, when I learned about victims of this abuse, I made contact with them, and offered my apology.

I have talked to victims and to some of the parents involved. I hear the anger, the hurt, and the sense of betrayal victims feel even 25 years later. The victim at the center of the Review story has very clearly shared with me his great anger.

The matter of sexual abuse and court settlements has touched almost every diocese in this country and others, including Canada, England, and Ireland. In Canada, various church communities ran government-sponsored schools, and one church and some Religious communities have almost gone bankrupt because of litigation concerning abuse of the Native peoples. That present litigation concerns both sexual abuse and also a so-called deprivation of Native culture.

Litigation has been the factor which has brought the issues to public attention. The problem is not only with church personnel, but abuse, sexual and physical, is in our communities, in our schools, and in families as well. Thank goodness in the Church and elsewhere we are much more sensitive to activities which are huge red flags of inappropriate behavior and grooming activity.

At the present moment it is hard to believe the fact that two or three decades ago, priests, coaches and teachers taking young people with them on trips or on vacation was considered to be “cool.” Such activity was considered to be almost a badge of pride.

But today, as we now well know, that kind of behavior not infrequently covered up manipulation and abuse. Church authorities and others involved in programs for young people very often were not aware of the depth of the problem or the unhealthy nature of these contacts.

The professionals in the counseling and mental health field did not fully realize how intractable the illness was which caused such behaviors. These behavioral patterns are frequently very addictive in nature and have come to be recognized in many instances as non-curable.

Frequently the Church today is criticized for events that happened decades ago using information we have come to know only in recent years. However, that does not lessen the pain, hurt, and alienation victims and their families experience.

I feel especially frustrated in striving to help victims. One called about an incident which took place over 50 years ago. He told me that not only has he left the Catholic Church but also has written off all organized religion. Fortunately, for me as a bishop, that type of call is very rare. I am most appreciative of how difficult it is for those who have worked up the courage to call.

Sometimes people have lived with their shame and guilt for decades, keeping the incident(s) to themselves. Once again, I invite those who might be victims to please contact me so that we can at least offer counseling. Often the matter of abuse is a cyclic pattern in which the victim can also become an abuser. In fact, a very high percentage of abusers have also been abused. I hope that victims coming forward will help us break the cycle of abuse.

I will not try to resolve the legal issues raised just by offering money or other compensation. We do not want to offer solutions without the abused having access to adequate representation. We cannot afford to act in a way which might be or be judged as again manipulative of the victims. Secondly, the legal issues are very complex. For example, in the case described in the Review, the criminal statute of limitations has passed on all of these incidents. There is no way criminal action can take place. In those cases where involvement of the criminal justice system is possible, we make the matter known to the authorities immediately and leave the process in their hands. Even when the criminal action cannot be taken, we attempt with the help of our insurance company, our legal counsel, and the sexual abuse committee of the diocese to do the best we can, including counseling and monetary settlements. We do not want to offer solutions without the intervention of advocates for those who have been abused. We cannot afford to act in a way which might be or be judged as again manipulative of the victims.

Sometimes parishioners have stopped donations to the Church because of such settlements, but I also would like to remind ourselves of how we as a society take on the responsibilities of supporting our prison systems and the mental health programs which deal with these abusers, even though we most likely have never done anything which would put us personally into these programs. Many Catholic dioceses in this country have paid out large amounts of money for settlements in order to address wrongs of the past. I have often thought of how frequently we talk of being a faith community together, how interconnected we are, and how that relationship has especially been recognized in the legal process.

Fortunately, these incidents for which clergy and Religious are responsible are fairly rare. We have our share in the history of this diocese, but probably less than would be average for a diocese of this size. But when such incidents have happened, they have an appeal to notoriety and become well known because priests and Religious especially are to called to be trusted persons in the community. How else would this story rate the front page headline for news that happened almost 30 years ago.

The lifestyle of the priest is counter-cultural and always challenging. I know of no statistic which indicates that the root of the problem lies in celibacy. Our priests, too, are hurt when abuse has been perpetrated by one of their brothers. It is not easy to be a religious leader when your integrity seems to be in question and you are required to stand before the community week after week.

We must not only be deeply concerned about victims, but have compassion for the perpetrators as well. Society has on the one hand an increasing sensitivity of awareness and carefulness. On the other hand, we must be careful about demonizing people who have done terrible things and are very broken people. They need help to put their lives back together. We must protect those who cannot help themselves and so structure the life situation of offenders to keep them from re-offending.

In conclusion, I ask all victims of abuse to please seek help. It makes no difference whether you were a young person abused by an adult, a spouse abused by your partner, a young person in a romantic relationship which turned abusive.

It is so easy for a victim to take on the guilt and shame of the abuse as if somehow he or she is partially responsible for it. None of us knows the trauma and, at times, the cross for a lifetime for those who have had these tragedies happen to them. The love of God must be very special toward them. The rest of us must continue to search for ways to develop more responsible and healthy ways of dealing with the powerful gift of our sexuality.

As Church we must also continue to find ways of assisting victims to deal with a broken past, oftentimes due to no fault of their own. I pray each day for wisdom.

May God bless all of you and give you peace.

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